There's a passage in the Bible came to mind the other day. It sort of snuck in by a strange route, but still a valid thought. I'm speaking of any of the several places where it says the sins of the parents will impact on the children for several generations. As a kid I'd always thought "how unfair is that?" thinking it was God who would be putting the hit on the kids and grandkids. A childish mistake, I didn't understand several things very well back then. Like so many things in the good book the point of the thought wasn't what God would be doing, the thought was how mankind would respond in reaction to itself… those passages were given as a warning, not a threat. The scripture popped to mind while thinking about the nature of my enemy bdsm. Truth is I was wondering just how far away from perverted thought does a person have to be to be fully safe from the perversions.
Since next up is a reconnaissance to map the boundaries of the thought environment that produces the perversions (with the ultimate goal of totally destroying that line of supply) I was examining the issue in the same frame of mind I used to use dealing with hazardous chemicals... what kind of PPE is needed, what safeguards for self and surrounding environment. I'm making ready to go into the contagious zones, the hot zones, to mount such a mission without absolute certainty of my own ethical integrity could easily end me a worse place than simply dead. Of course 'how far away' really doesn't have much to do with physical distance or wind direction, and the safety gear required is in the form of immutable understandings that will penetrate even the most subtle of lies, but still, a valid analogy.
At first I engaged a mode of thought drawn from the "six degrees of separation" theory. A useful first thought, but not all that well suited to my needs. A base assumption of the theory states it only holds true for "an unstructured network." Well, the macroscopic society is anything but unstructured, when examined in the framework of the collective entities it is heavily structured. Many of the groups that make up society are all but closed, only a minor percentage of their component individuals known between the factions.
( For example I'd bet there are very few publicly known as primitive christians who are also publicly known as practitioners of bdsm. There may be a few, there's always a few, but by and large I'd say the vast majority of those involved with both worlds would not be known as members of both worlds by the other members of either world. The base definitions of the respective collective entities are just not compatible enough to support a public dual allegiance. The number of node individuals willing to publicly access both realms is actually very limited compared to the total population of the respective sets. )
I bounced the thought around for a while, and then realized I was still making the mistake of thinking simple spatial rather than the node and weighted edge system required to represent reality. In reality the edges must be weighted according to the emotional compatibility of the collective entities hosted between any given pair of individuals. The complexity becomes daunting in a great big hurry. Just how far apart are we, one from the other, when society is examined under such a microscope? And how far is far enough? How does one go about weighting such edges? An interesting question. A very, very interesting question when you need to take the answer into the field and put it to work where an error in the mode of thought just might turn out to be a soul killer if translated into reality.
As the saying goes: back to the drawing board. And what did I find when I got there? The wisdom from the good book, sitting patiently and waiting for me to understand the clue given. The sins of the father... hmmm...
Hi: Well, it feels as if I am arriving late to a party - I don't really know the history that informs this post, but it is intriguing nevertheless. Furthermore, I am not into bdsm and so anything I would add would be conjecture at best. But the "sins of the father" reference - that I can relate to, and I wholly agree that the reference serves more of a warning than threat. The older I get the more I realize that the chains that bind us are breakable. We all have them, of course, and at certain points in our lives we have the opportunity to break them. In my case, I was able to break the chain of alcoholism that existed in my family for generations - as far back as I could research. It didn't occur by becoming a tee-totaler, but rather by consciously deciding what was and what was not the issue, and killing it at its source. I don't think we can win a fight without getting our hands on our "opponent" - dancing around the edges of the ring may avoid pain and conflict, but it doesn't win the fight. Rather, sizing up the opponent, looking at where it likes to hurt you, and then going in to handle THAT - that's how I believe we break the chains (or win the fight) that seeks to hold us back.
ReplyDeleteYou referred to bdsm as your enemy, and wondered how far from a perverted thought one needs to be to be safe... Good question, and it feels to me that the answer is somewhat proportional to the amount of energy one gives it. There are people long dead and out of my life that I sometimes still give power to - evidence of the fact that their hold on me has nothing to do with them, but with me. The space between my ears is the only space I really have to work with.
Personally, I find bdsm interesting but in my observation, it seems that it has the potential to be demeaning on several levels. Even with "safe words" agreements, and all the rest, it feels all the world to me as if participants are trying to "re-live" or "re-experience" something unpleasant in a controlled environment in order to somehow arrive at a different outcome. When my children were little I found myself thinking about my experiences at their age, sometimes actually comparing them. It was a kind of re-visiting my own childhood, and being given the gift of choosing for my children a different outcome (or repeating it). It is one of the joys of parenthood - to be presented with an opportunity to "break the chain" if it needs breaking.
I have heard bdsm is also often about control - assuming it, or relinquishing it, and exploring the unknown for a time. Who wouldn't enjoy that experience? (it's why we love the haunted house on Halloween, or whitewater rafting, etc.) Yet, it isn't always about the experience ONLY - it seems to hold deep significance in past events for a lot of people. That space between the ears thing...
All this is to say that in my limited observation of bdsm, so much of it seems a way of confronting what has a hold on us. Some are content to rattle the chain. Others to re-use it, and some to break it, or re-shape it. For me, it's not about a THING, but about what that thing MEANS that matters most as to whether or not I will use it, or it will use me.
Hi, and thanks for stopping by! Glad you found my ramblings an interesting read. I am not into bdsm either, in fact I am a dedicated enemy of that form of thought and all that it implies for our culture. I didn't pick the fight, for the last fifty years that form of thought has been attacking my life. Perhaps the attacks were simple coincidence and bad luck on my part, or perhaps not, but now that I'm retired and my time is my own I'm in a position to mount a defense of self and society, in the last year it has become a common subject in both thought and writings, many of this year's posts deal with the subject.
DeleteIt would appear we share some common thoughts on the subject, most specifically the idea of that space between ears: ours, theirs, whoever's. In my conversations with several active practitioners I've seen things about the bdsm culture that have positive, or the potential for positive, effect on the lives of those who practice them... and not one of those positive things would suffer in the least to being lifted out of the shadow cast onto history by the barbarian Marquis de Sade. The kids don’t need to imbibe cruelty to scar the life they're often trying to repair.
To ignore the explosion of the bdsm mentality into the culture is to ignore the social problems that foster bdsm, a luxury I don't think our society can afford right now. My focus on this subject is to identify, isolate and act to minimize the impact of the social forces that produce bdsm, I'm very much hoping for others to contribute observations and understandings on the subject. Yours would be a welcome presence.
The "sins of the fathers" proverb is mentioned early in the Bible; but later in the Book, Ezekiel brings a message that Israel was no longer to use this proverb. (See Ezekiel 18: http://www.blueletterbible.org/Bible.cfm?b=Eze&c=18&t=KJV ) And of course, the message of Jesus' life, teachings, and especially Resurrection is about transformation: "And be not conformed to this world, but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind..." (Romans 12:2)
ReplyDeleteThe warning about a parent's sins damaging his/her children is well taken--but our parents' sins do not have to define our lives. We. Can. Break. Free! But to break a chain, we must know it right down to its weakest link and its unconscious hold on us...
Yup. The sins of the (parents) are transferred onto the children by way of parenting... mental problems can be contagious when considered from that perspective. A large part of my effort is going to be focusing on transferring that understanding to the kids, so they have a leg from which to stand and fight for their own mental freedom. What I really need is a damn good band with one of those charismatic female vocalists somewhere in the gone dark gothic acoustic trance genre who's in need of some hard hitting lyrics...
DeleteSongs can definitely be counterspells against some of the "spiritual wickedness in high places" that characterize Earthly life, especially these days.
Delete"But where sin abounded, grace did much more abound". (Romans 5:20) We have all known people who despite "disadvantaged" backgrounds and even familial abuse have grown up to do great good, exchanging "the sins of the fathers" for grace and peace. Therefore, I cannot believe that any evil is all-powerful and definitive in any sense--even this one.
taking what i consider to be a given: that every action, whether consciously decided upon, or coming about through automatic reaction
ReplyDeletegoverned by embedded memes, is triggered by what occurred in the moment
previous. we are an accumulation of the past, reaching all the way back
to the singularity, [God caused or not}, which would of course, include
"the sins of the father".
if one had the wherewithal of factoring in all of experienced history,
one might predict the next reaction to the next occurrence, other than
if and when the individual exerts his/her free will, the effectiveness
of which would naturally be governed by that individuals knowledge of and ability to consider previous influences.
to change embedded behaviors such as BDSM, first - one would need the active participant to understand the potential destructive nature of such behavior. the appropriate feelings of concern should cause the individual to question from what and where in their past experiences the triggers for their enjoyment of those practices has arisen.
most, but not by many means all of BDSM predilections would originate from the 'nurture' part of our personality development, i would think. especially, the dominance characteristics of BDSM would more likely tend to originate from the 'nature' part, [our genetic inheritance of aggressive tendencies].
generally, i think it would be difficult to seduce someone into the culture if they weren't first inclined that way by the acquired 'nature/nurture' in their personalities.
with the foregoing in mind, 'nos, combating the organized culture is, i think, half of the battle at best. however, it is a worthwhile battle, i'd say.
pip
I'm only focusing on the established bdsm culture in one respect, and that is the pornography/propaganda it is generating to proselytize the deformities. As usual the most abominable of the true villains are found in the commercial endeavors, where profit is of more concern than anything involving any form or facet of wholesome human dignity. Other than that it would appear they are organized at a primitive clan level, now cross linked by way of the anonymity of the internet. As for the pornsters who are taking profit by spreading the misery? *click* *click* *click* *click* *click* *click* *feral grin*
Delete